There are some things you swear you'll never do, because you don't want to be one of those people. You've seen it happen so many times, often to people you know, and you know it never, ever works out the way they think it will. They start out so happy, adamant they're doing the right thing. They try to convince you - and themselves - that this is no whim. They have thought about this and they know you think it's a bad idea, but this is the start of a new life for them.
And you think, 'What a cliche, I already know how this is going to end. Why bother? It's going to last a week, a month at best. Then you'll wonder what on earth you were thinking.'
But then I did it myself, not so long ago.
I bought a very expensive blender.
I decided I was not eating enough fruit and vegetables. I had some every day, but not enough, nowhere near enough. And I couldn't realistically see how throwing some raisins on my cereal in the morning – apparently a top tip - would make a significant difference.
Then I came across Deliciously Ella and her delicious smoothies. These seem easy to make, I thought. Fairly normal ingredients. I could make those.
I could have them EVERY DAY. Loads of fruit and veg thrown into a blender to make a nice drink that's easy to include as part of my day. EVERY DAY.
I will soon look amazing and feel cleansed and virtuous and - my God, is that how much a good blender costs?
Perhaps I should get a cheap one, see if I actually make them EVERY DAY first.
Nah, false economy, because I am going to make them every day. If I have a crappy blender, I might not want to make them. It might put me off blending. And when I have stuck to it for ages as I'm going to, I will only have to upgrade and then I'll have wasted money on a cheap blender that could have gone towards a real blender, making the real blender actually more expensive. I should just start saving money right off the bat and buy one good blender.
This began with reading Deliciously Ella's guide to the best blenders. I soon decided which one was for me: Breville's The Boss (I think it's called Sage The Boss in the UK). Expensive. But it does loads! It makes soup, including heating it for you! It has a self-cleaning function - saving me from blade injuries! It has a massive jug - no need to blend in poxy batches (Kenwood food processor, I'm looking at you)!
I then read user reviews of The Boss. There weren’t many - probably because of the cost, or perhaps because the buyers are too busy blending - but the overall feeling was definitely ‘you get what you pay for’. Same with most things, yes?
Yes. I am buying The Boss.
Where to buy
There are no mindblowing deals to be had on The Boss - at least, not when I bought it - but eBay was holding some kind of retailer event to save 10% or something. 10% is quite a lot, when it's 10% of a million dollars (approximate price of blender - I hardly dare type how much it cost out loud).
After doing a few calculations (bought smoothie costs around $7 - make one a day for next five years and blender is effectively free, or something like that), the deal was done. Click. Bought.
Instant euphoria was almost instantly replaced by guilt, which was then cancelled out by the certainty that blender would be blending EVERY DAY and would also lead to new, fruit-and-veg-filled me. Hurrah.
I could hardly carry the box. In fact, the delivery guy left it on the floor and gestured to it: 'There you go'.
It was REALLY HEAVY.
I pushed it along the ground, tipping it up to get it over the threshold. Then left it just inside the door. So bloody heavy!
Oh. I just about finished the post and lost all the work up to the point where I pressed save to go to the loo :( And it won’t come back :(
It’s too depressing to relive The Blender Diaries again! Even though you will now be deprived of my brown smoothie experience!
In a nutshell:
- it took me several days to move it to the kitchen
- I have made exactly two (brown) smoothies since buying it in July
- the saving grace is that is makes the most tremendous soups and everyone should get one and fall in love with their Boss.
For anyone (mums) worried that I am still not consuming adequate quantities of fruit and vegetables, fear not. I now pack loads of (unblended) vegetables into my dinners and aim to eat a piece of fruit each day (which works best when I remember to buy the fruit – I am currently out, with the exception of four very ripe bananas waiting to be made into a cake).
Argh, I can’t believe I lost the post. Before I even fired up the laptop, I told myself to write it in Word, as WordPress/my blogging software is so blogging unreliable. Then I threw caution to the wind, dismissing my fears as paranoia – why on earth should I lose all my writing? Just do it! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrgh.
No point getting frustrated. Just because it’s the first post I’ve written in ages :( I have a manuscript to be cracking on with today, anyway – can’t be wasting time retyping drivel that the computer didn’t think worth saving, much less me.
Aaaaaaaaaarrgh (I am quite frustrated).
Oh, let’s end on a high – my current favourite soup to make and blend is Asparagus, Potato, Pea and Mint. The recipe is by Covent Garden Soups but I’m not going to reproduce it here as I’m pretty sure that’s illegal. Try throwing those ingredients into a pan along with some stock though, and prepare to love your life.
I’m also going to be one of those blender evangelists – briefly – and tell you why the blender – in particular The Boss – is awesome. It somehow makes all soups taste as though you’ve added cream to them – they are richly delicious. But without being too creamy, as can happen when you actually add cream. It also seems to fill them with air or something – despite the richness, they are also light. Yet filling. I know: it’s a mass of contradictions. Soup becomes a satisfying, substantial meal in its own right and the lack of texture is irrelevant, because the smoothness feels so good in your mouth – chunks are unnecessary. Plus you can always have it with bread.
Finally, making soup is peasy. I doubt I’ll ever buy it ready-made again. What is the point? Canned/bagged soup tastes rubbish in comparison. And I love seeing all the veg going into the pan – very healthy. And it’s an excellent way to use up vegetables. On Monday I threw carrots, parsnip, red onion and celery into a pan with some other bits (cumin seeds, coriander and the like). Sensational. And none of it bought specially – it was all already in the fridge/lying around from previous roast dinners, salads etc. I ate it with a toasted bagel.
See? Paying for itself.
P.S. $700. And retailer did not honour the 10% thing in the end. But that's still only about 200 cans of soup to break even. I used to buy about three cans a year, so free soup for me from 100 years old onwards, by which time it's all I'll be able to eat anyway. Bargain.