Ever persevered with a project in which you have little to no faith? And wondered what the hell was wrong with you? This is a tale about one of my famous hand-crocheted blankets.* Except that this one never got the chance to be famous because it was so bloody ugly. Why did I keep flogging this obviously dead horse?
The disgusting blanket
Once upon a time, someone I like gave birth. I made a little blanket for them. It went very well.
Then a couple - of whom I'm rather fond - decided to have a baby too, and I thought I might have a go at another blanket. Not wanting to replicate the first effort, but create a second unique piece, I began my new project in earnest, with a mental image of how it would look.
As the blanket took shape, I started to lose faith in my vision - it was not looking good in real life. I kept asking my husband what he thought of it - I think I wanted permission to scrap it! But he kept endorsing the monstrosity, so on I went, in spite of serious misgivings.
I wondered if it was just me - am I being overly self-critical? No, it's genuinely hideous, isn't it? Isn't it, husband? No, he said. Nice blanket, he said. On we went with the vile creation. More and more repulsive rows.
The blanket was approaching completion. I was a couple of rows from the end when I asked again, in near desperation, for a second second opinion. This time, husband conceded that it was a little insipid (or words to that effect - I practically shoved the words in his mouth).
Finally! I knew it! It was revolting. Hurrah! Now I could rip it up! I'm still not sure why I needed somebody else to say it was crap when I could see it was crap. Also, why didn't I start it again when I had done ten rows and hated it, rather than 100+ rows? What is wrong with me? Best not pull at that thread.
Anyway, I undid the whole thing. I could hardly believe I was doing it but, at the same time, what a relief to be able to erase this eyesore!
I started again with a completely different pattern in mind and the resulting blanket was infinitely more pleasing. I liked this one. Hurrah.
Then it came to handing it over.
Suddenly, I didn't think it was good enough! I imagined making a present of it and I couldn't. So I took a trip to the wool shop, bought a new lot of wool and made a completely different blanket again. And this time I was extremely happy with the finished product. And the new baby got his blanket in time for the cold weather.
The other blanket, super cute and old-fashioned looking, is still waiting for me to be happy enough with it to bestow it on a tiny person. It's so lovely - what's wrong with me?
*My hand-crocheted blankets are not famous. I make them only in exceptional circumstances for exceptional people and those people and circumstances are few and far between.
NB Illustration - if you can see it - shows one of the baby blankets that I actually loved and gave away. Not the foul ex-blanket, nor its perfectly adequate but just not good enough successor - they have not been photographed.So please don't look at it thinking that you can see why I was so appalled - this is the best one!